


Ex-traordinary Measures

by Peggystormborn



Series: Every Time...A Karamel Anthology [8]
Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Canon compliant through end of season 3, F/M, Heist, Jealous Mon-El (Supergirl TV 2015), KaraMel, Karamel spent 10 years in the future then came back with their kids
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-29
Updated: 2018-08-29
Packaged: 2019-07-04 04:34:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,998
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15833850
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Peggystormborn/pseuds/Peggystormborn
Summary: The DEO finds out one of Lex Luthor's buddies has gotten his hands on a type of Kryptonite they've never seen before. But to get it back, they'll need some help...from Kara's ex.





	Ex-traordinary Measures

**Author's Note:**

> Another installment in my Karamel series. Kara and Mon spent a decade in the future and are now back, married with kids. 
> 
> Sorry this took so long to post, life stuff! But don't worry I have more ideas even if my schedule is a little more challenging.

Ex-traordinary Measures

It was only 8:39 am, but so far it had been a pretty normal Wednesday. Kara and Mon-El got the kids up and ready for the day, did their customary thank you to Rao for giving them super speed, which is pretty much the only reason they are able to get four kids and themselves up, fed, dressed and out the door each morning. Kara checks in with James at Catco, Mon-El drops Allie at school, then hauls the rest of his brood to DEO day care before changing into his agent uniform and heading down to the CIC. He likes wearing his old black uniform around the DEO. Likes the feeling of solidarity with the other agents, despite the fact that he is anything but typical here. After all, he's an alien with extraordinary powers, and husband to the most powerful woman in the world. Plus he'd been the leader of the Legion for all those years. But this place? The DEO is Kara and Alex’s show, and he wouldn't have it any other way. He gives his input, of course. But he doesn't miss the overwhelming responsibility, the shackles of leadership. He's happier here, just as he was all those years ago, before he left the first time. He's quite content to be his wife's second in command. It's easier now, as well. After years of managing the Legion together, they tend to think as one anyway. He loves how in sync they are now. For the most part, that is.

He wanders over to his usual terminal, and sits down next to Winn, who's doing his morning workup on threat analysis.

“Hey, man. You look a little tired,” Winn remarks upon seeing his friend.

“Yeah, you too. Though I'm willing to bet your fatigue may have a more fun explanation than mine.”

“Baby John keeping you up?”

“Yup. And the twins still want to sleep in bed with Mommy and Daddy every night.”

“Aww, at least they're all snuggly, right? That must be nice.”

“Yeah, but so is my wife. And at some point I'd like to get back to just cuddling her. She doesn't kick me in the junk in her sleep. Usually.”

“Ha! You know, I will say it's really nice having someone to share a bed with after all these years. Plus, you know. The sex.” Winn and his new girlfriend Eve are still in their honeymoon phase, and everyone at the DEO has grown accustomed to him finding a way to reference his budding romance with the bubbly blonde in damn near every conversation these days.

Mon-El rolls his eyes good-naturedly at his friend. “Take my advice, though, if you're ever planning on having kids. Enjoy sharing it with just one person while you can.”

For a moment, Winn wears a dopey, wistful smile, clearly daydreaming about something, before pulling himself back to reality. “Uh, yeah, I'll do that.”

Just then, the sound of stiletto heels clicking across the floor echoes in Mon-El’s super ears.

He's heard that cadence often enough to recognize it, though rarely has known it to echo through these particular halls.

Lena.

He and Winn jump up to greet her just as Alex marches in, apparently expecting Ms. Luthor’s arrival. Kara whooshes into the room in short order, having been notified via her comms.

“Good morning, everyone,” Lena begins. “Sorry to just barge in like this, but it's somewhat urgent. I got a call from Albatross Bay last night. My mother. Normally they don't do visiting hours in the evening, but apparently Mommy dearest has some sway over there. Anyway, one of her cronies picked up a critical piece of intel. Her network is too depleted to do anything about it, so she had no choice but to have me pass it along to you.”

“Why didn't she just tell us directly through official channels?” Alex asks.

“She doesn't want to get a reputation as a snitch, I guess. Also, she more or less hates all of you. At any rate, one of Lex's former business associates, Ross Webster, has acquired the contents of one of Lex's old off-site storage vaults. Some kind of sketchy auction or something. According to her sources, the contents of that vault included a few of my brother's failed experiments from when he was trying to figure out how to manufacture Kryptonite. He never quite got the recipe, thank God. But he did develop something he called ‘Anti-kryptonite.’ It didn't work on your cousin, apparently, but it produces symptoms of kryptonite poisoning...in humans. Lex didn't have any particular use for it since he was mainly concerned with defeating Superman, but he kept it around just in case.”

“And now this Webster person has it?” Kara asks.

“Yes. Most likely in his own secure vault. But she doesn't think he knows what he has exactly. It'll be in a protective case along with numerous other items, and it's unlikely they'll have had a chance to inventory and test everything. But he's been known to traffic in black market weapons. If he gets his hands on this stuff, he could sell it to any number of terrorist groups, organized criminals, you name it. Or worse yet, if he figures out how to replicate it…”

“Holy Rao. Okay, so what else do we know about this guy?” Mon-El asks.

“He's a bit flamboyant,” Winn interjects, flipping through the DEO's files on their apparent baddie of the week. “Throws a lot of parties...oh, including one this Saturday. Could be a good opportunity to sneak in and pinch the stuff.”

Lena demurs. “You can't just steal it. Right now it's not common knowledge this stuff exists. Only my mother and a few of her key people knew it was in that particular vault. You'll have to sneak in and replace it with a harmless replica. That way Webster and his people will just think it's something Lex never got working.”

“Good idea. So what's the plan, then? I mean, orchestrating heists isn't really something the DEO typically does.” Winn’s right, they all seem to agree as they look around the table at each other. This is a little outside their wheelhouse.

“I know someone we can ask for help. But it might be...a tad awkward,” Kara offers.

“Why? Who are you thinking of?” her husband wonders, raising an eyebrow at his mate.

“Well, Ray has done jobs like this before.”

“Ray as in your ex-boyfriend?” Mon-El can't help the tiny bite of jealousy in his tone. It's been years now, and he knows Ray is a good man, a man who quite frankly he feels his own affection for, since he's part of the reason the two of them finally found their way back to each other. Nevertheless, there's some small part of him that grumbles internally at the idea of asking for help from a man who used to sleep with the love of his life.

“No, honey, Ray as in my postal carrier.” Her words drip with uncharacteristic sarcasm, causing her husband to make an incredulous face. “Yes, of course I mean Ray my ex, goofball. He can shrink to the size of an ant. I'm guessing that might come in handy when trying to break into a vault unnoticed.”

“Wait, but he gave us his tech, can't we just use what we developed from his blueprints?” Mon-El asks, hoping there's a way around this.

“Well, he gave us plenty of the dwarf star ore and yes, I do have the suit plans. But I never got around to constructing it. I just modified parts of the design for his shrink ray for use by AIs so we could weaponize them to fight Brainiac," Winn says.

“Why didn't you build the suit?” Alex wonders.

“Well, for one thing, he was really nervous about it falling into the wrong hands, understandably. So I didn't actually build anything we weren't going to immediately use. For another thing, well, much as I hate to admit this the guy is a lot smarter than me. Yes, _fine_ , I said it. But, see, even with the plans there's…well, there's an art to fabricating stuff like this. If I get it wrong it could go really REALLY wrong. Last thing I wanted was for someone to get hurt or killed because I couldn't wrap my head around the nuances of extraterrestrial metallurgy. You know?”

“Well, can we borrow his suit?” Alex asks. Mon-El ponders this for a moment, a little hopefully. Might be kinda cool to see the world from an insect’s perspective. He wouldn't mind trying it out.

“No, his suit has safeguards so only he can use it. Evidently there was some sort of incident with a samurai or shogun or something,” Kara puts the kibosh on her husband's brief daydream. Also... _samurai_? Mon-El is reminded of his former romantic rival's wealth of stories about the cool places in history he's been and interesting people he's gotten to meet. _Well, I got the girl, at least_. He smiles at his wife, despite the fact that she's still talking about Mr. Shrinky-Dink.

“...We'll need him here in person. Besides, Ray's got experience breaking into places and stealing things,” Kara argues. “…you know, for the greater good,” she adds when everyone around the table gives her a collective side-eye.

“All right, then. Give him a call, Kara. We've got a heist to plan,” Alex says as Mon-El makes a face that somehow conveys both discomfort and resignation.

Winn makes an audible _SQUEEE_ sound as they huddle around the CIC. “Oh my God, it's like Ocean’s Eleven! Or, you know. Ocean's Eight. Cause feminism and stuff.”

********

As if things weren't weird enough, the plan involves Kara and Ray posing as a couple. Kara's x-ray vision is an imperative for finding the Anti-K (which she also can handle safely), and of course Ray’s suit and shrink gun are needed to access Webster's vault. Winn, aka the DEO’s hacker extraordinare, is thankfully able to find them a floor plan for the house so they at least know more or less where they're going.

They also use image modulation devices to turn themselves from mild-mannered reporter Kara Danvers and tech pioneer Dr. Raymond Palmer into wealthy but little-known silicon valley tech startup founder Evan Michaelson and his fiancée, up-and-coming model Véronique Pelletier. Winn has successfully managed to divert the couple's private plane to Vancouver for a few hours, just long enough for them to miss out on the party.

Kara, lacking a large selection of formal wear, dons the same backless red dress she wore all those years ago on the night Mon-El showed up with Imra and Winn, only to find Kara having a lovers’ spat with her then-boyfriend. The same man who's going to be taking her out, all dressed up, to _another_ fancy party tonight.

Mon-El sees her emerge from the locker room at the DEO, looking like she's about to stroll down a red carpet. He himself is still in his tactical gear. He thinks about that night when he saw her wearing this very dress. With _him_. He remembers how sick he felt, how his heart broke seeing how much she cared about this other man. He shakes off the thought, telling himself that all the pain was ultimately worth it. After all, if it weren't for that unpleasantness, he might not have found her again. Might not have had a chance to be a father to the four amazing kids currently occupying their grandparents’ house in Midvale, and hopefully not giving Eliza and Jeremiah too much trouble.

“You know, one day I'd really like to take you somewhere in a dress like this just for fun. Like _normal_ people do.” He wraps his arms around her waist and gives her a quick kiss on her luscious lips. He'd sure like to do more, but obviously it's neither the time nor the place. Which is unfortunate, since between the kids, work, and superheroing, it's been a few weeks since they had any alone time at all.

“Aww, well maybe sometime when we're not dealing with an immediate threat to public safety. And we can get a sitter.”

“Sooooo...quarter to never?”

“I'll pencil you in one of these days, promise.”

“Until then, maybe I'll just look forward to getting you out of this dress later and…” he leans over to whisper something scandalous in her ear, before…

“Hi guys! Good to see you!” Ray comes bounding up, from the portal neither Kara nor Mon-El had realized just opened behind them.

“Hi, Ray,” Kara gives Ray a sweet smile, while Mon-El attempts to derail his own rather dirty train of thought.

“Uh, hello, Ray. Good to see you, too. Thanks for helping us out,” the Daxamite offers.

“Sure thing! What are super friends for?”

“Apparently they're for breaking and entering, trespassing, grand theft, and the like,” Alex interrupts, having come to fetch them all over to the CIC. “Seriously, thanks for this, Ray. I know this is above and beyond.”

“Eh, not really, for me breaking in places and stealing stuff is actually kind of par for the course.”

“Riiigght…” Alex says. “Anyway, let's review the plan one more time before we head out. Oh and check to make sure your image modulators are working.”

Ray and Kara tap the switches behind their ears and suddenly turn into other people.

“Whoa…that's…weird,” Winn falters, finding their appearance a bit off-putting. The others agree, and it's a bit of a struggle for everyone to get through their last-minute walkthrough of the plan.

“Okay, hopefully this should be pretty simple,” Alex begins, commanding authority as she paces in front of various screens showing images of the house and grounds. “After you arrive, you wait for an opportunity to make your way to the basement vault. Ray will open it, and Kara will then switch out the Anti-K, using a lead-lined bag to muffle its effects. Once that's done you will use Ray's time courier to portal out of there.”

“Wait, why can't they just portal in?” Eve asks. Eve Teschmacher is as new to the team as she is to Winn’s life--their relationship still in that shiny, new, can't-keep-your-hands-off-each-other stage--but she's proven to be a tremendous asset. A physicist by training, she's developed a particular expertise in the field of astrochemistry through her work with Lena. So naturally (and happily), Winn brought her in to consult for this little caper.

“We can't portal in sight unseen, it's too risky,” Alex explains. “We don't have an exact schematic of the vault and we don't know what else might be in there. Best to cloak and dagger it until we gain access. Anyway, the DEO will be on comms the whole time in case backup is needed, but will maintain radio silence so long as everything is going to plan. Are you guys ready?”

Kara and Ray both give a little salute and say “Yes ma’am” in answer to Alex's authoritative demeanor. They share a chuckle at their like-mindedness as Mon-El grinds his teeth a little.

Half an hour later, Kara and Ray walk into the party in their black-tie attire, wearing the faces of two strangers.

“You know, with all the time I spend pretending to be someone I'm not, you'd think this would be easier,” Kara says as they stroll amongst the guests.

“Just try and relax. Act natural. In fact, why don't we have a dance while we sort out where Webster and his cronies are.”

Kara shrugs her assent and they join the other slow dancing couples in the dimly lit room. It's a large ballroom, the kind you usually only see in hotels rather than private homes, and impeccably decorated. There are candles lit here and there, and a brass band is belting out hits of the 40s. Kara can't help tapping her foot, and feeling like she's stepped into a Fred Astaire movie.

“So…how's Dad life? Must be hard juggling everything.” Kara's curiosity is genuine. She knows he adopted two kids, a boy and a girl, from the 1820s. They were orphans who would have died without his intervention. But she hasn't seen them or heard much about how they're adjusting to their new time and family situation. Or how Ray is acclimating to suddenly being a single father of two.

“Well, it's not easy. I rely on lots of help from my team. Felicity and Oliver and their folks help out on occasion. Their son William is a pretty good babysitter, actually. Oh, and I found a very understanding nanny.”

“Yeah, I suppose they'd have to be, huh? What with you running off to other time periods and whatnot.”

“I'm only part time now. Just come in for the really important stuff. You know, like burglary.” He winks at her and she laughs a little, amused as always by his charm. “How about you? I only have two and they're both old enough to walk and talk and use the bathroom by themselves. I mean, once I explained how a bathroom works. I can't imagine four little ones all at once.”

“Well, I have a wonderful partner, luckily…” Aaannnd now it's awkward again. Since once upon a time, less than a year ago to Ray, Kara was his partner. It feels like ancient history to her, since from her perspective it's been more than ten years. She tries to move on quickly from her gaffe. “Uh, but, yeah. It's a constant balancing act. Especially when you factor in their burgeoning powers.”

“They have powers already? Wow, that must be challenging.”

“Well, being a single dad to two kids adjusting to a 200-year time jump must be a bit of a challenge too.”

“That it is. Though actually, I'm not precisely…single. I'm sort of seeing someone.”

“Oh, really?” Kara smiles broadly, sincerely delighted. He's such a good man. She'd love to see him find the happiness she's found with Mon-El. “Who is she? Anyone I know?”

“You haven't met her. She's, uh, she's really wonderful. Her name is Helen.”

“Helen? Ha, knowing you it's, like, Helen of Troy or something.”

Ray stops in his tracks and stares blankly at her. “How did you…?”

“What, seriously? I was kidding, are you telling me you're literally dating Helen of Troy?”

“I mean, yeah, we've been seeing each other.”

Kara belts out a rather conspicuous belly laugh and has to quickly rein it in. After all, they're not supposed to be drawing any attention to themselves.

Making a little more effort to blend in, they talk and dance a bit, while surreptitiously looking out for the party’s host and his flunkies. Ray brags about his kids, how they're thriving. He thinks Jacob may be a musical prodigy while Anna has quite the aptitude for science. They give each other that knowing smile, the one parents wear with pride when they talk about the little people at the center of their respective worlds. The shared feeling that things worked out just as they were meant to, since whatever hell you went through in the past led you to these amazing, perfect little creatures that you love with your whole heart, just as they are.

They get so engrossed in their conversation and the dance that he nearly dips her right into Webster and his weaselly right-hand man, Edgar Frist. Webster, still a silver fox at the age of 62 with Paul-Newman-esque handsomeness, looks entirely amused at having almost been knocked over. Ever the sniveling lackey, Frist seems far less entertained, his eyes peeking over the rims of his wire frame glasses, conveying disapproval at their antics despite the jovial setting.

“Oh, well, hello there,” Webster oozes a rather creepy charm at Kara once she rights herself. “I see someone's enjoying the music. Guess I'm getting my money's worth out of the band there. Est-ce que vous vous amusez?” He kisses Kara's hand as she stares at him like a deer caught in headlights. Crap! She's supposed to be French.

“Uh...oui?” she squeaks, panicking a little. Luckily, Ray comes to the rescue.

“Oui, bien sur! Je vous remercie de nous avoir invités.” Kara exhales, thankful for his universal translation device. Or possibly Ray really speaks French, who knows with this guy.

“Right...well, nice to finally meet you, Evan. If word of mouth can be believed you're the next Steve Jobs. I hear through the grapevine you guys are considering an IPO early next year…anything you can tell me now? Hmm?” Webster leans in closer, conspiratorially. He grabs Ray's arm with a heavy grip, as if he's loath to let him get away.

“Uh, ha, well, that's privileged information. But…nothing's set in stone yet. I'll say that much.” Ray, despite being typically a terrible liar, at least has enough experience in situations like this to bullshit his way through.

“Right. Well, I'll let you two get back to the party. Though I do hope the young lady will save a dance for me.” He leers at Kara, making her rather uncomfortable despite knowing that it's someone else's face he's making eyes at.

When he walks away, Kara and Ray look at each other with concern. He wasn't supposed to talk to them. They were supposed to fade into the background and avoid his line of sight. But they got distracted, as they tend to do when they're around each other. They may not have dated for some time, but that old connection is still there.

Nothing to be done about it now, so while Webster and Frist are busy gladhanding their many guests, Kara and Ray attempt to inconspicuously make their way to the far side of the ballroom and out to the patio. Using surveillance drones coupled with their intel on the floor plan of the house, Winn has ascertained that there's an exterior entrance to the lower level of the facility. It's most likely locked from the inside, but of course a run-of-the-mill lock is no impediment for Ray. So they sneak off, peeking around corners as they go, making their way to the side door.

“Uh oh…” Ray says as they round the last turn. “Guards. And they're coming this way.”

“Crap. Should we, like, kiss or something?” Kara asks.

“What? Why?” Ray balks.

“I dunno, they always do it in the movies!”

“...or we could just hide behind the hedge there.”

“Oh, right. Yeah.” She (sheepishly) speeds the two of them to a spot behind said shrubbery, and they wait for the guards to depart.

“Phew! Okay, let's get inside before something else happens.” Kara says as they emerge from their hiding spot.

“Sure thing. I certainly don't want to get jumped by another Kryptonian…” he teases as he dons his suit. Kara gasps at his jibe, lightly punching him in the shoulder and stifling another belly laugh. Ray shrinks down small enough to pick the lock from the inside.

Finally the door opens, and they proceed down a flight of stairs, through a narrow set of hallways and, at long last, to the vault. Ray utilizes a fancy device of his own making to disarm the alarm, then works his tiny-man magic on the lock. Winn has already accessed the security system, so they ignore the many cameras pointed in their direction.

There it is. The heavy, presumably lead-lined box that contains the Anti-K. Kara can't see through it, at any rate. Ray's suit should give him some protection from the Anti-K. They hope.

“Okay, moment of truth. Hopefully Smithers or one of the other minions doesn't come running as soon as I open this…”

“Ha, Smithers. I see what you did there.” Ray laughs along at her reference. “Webster does seem _almost_ as evil as Mr. Burns…”

Kara lets out a deep breath as she lifts the latch and swings the small door open.

The moment she does, she gets a queasy feeling which quickly morphs into terrible pain. She keels over, strength leaving her body.

“Kara! What's...ohhh…oh, no…” Ray feels the same sickness, and collapses next to her.

“Supergirl? Atom? What's happening?” Alex's voice barely reaches the two of them over the comms, lost as they are in a bubble of pain and disorientation.

Kara is out cold now, but Ray has just enough lucidity to answer back. “There's...regular Kryptonite...too. Suit...not helping…”

The DEO snaps into crisis mode. Winn, tapping away at his terminal, suddenly realizes what's going on.

“Uh, oh…okay, we couldn't tell before but now that the case is open there are clearly two radiation signatures coming from the vault. One, best I can tell, is some kind of especially potent Green Kryptonite, and the other is the Anti-K. But I think we miscalculated the wavelength. I'm sorry, we didn't have a sample to work from, we had to make some assumptions. Shoot…okay…bad news is I don't think the lead bag is gonna be any kind of protection from the Anti-K.”

“Oh, God. Oh my God. This is bad. Well, is there good news? Give me something, guys.” Alex asks desperately, a look of panic forming behind her eyes. She glances at Mon-El, who's wearing a similar look on his face.

“Ooh! I know!” Eve interjects, looking at the screen over Winn’s shoulder. “You need a different metal! Look around, see if there's something gold or platinum, some kind of container you can put it in.”

Ray, still in agony on the floor, pulls it together enough to look around, seeing a wealth of various pieces of art along with what appear to be some ancient artifacts. He points the camera on his suit at something on a nearby shelf that looks like a gold decanter or jug. “What...about this?” he ekes out.

Eve, staring at the image on the DEO’s monitor, recognizes it immediately. “Ooh! That's ancient Greek, 16th century BC. Or it would be except it's a fake. The real one is in the archaeological museum in Athens. Yeah, it should work.”

“Have I told you how sexy you are when you're a smarty pants?” Winn beams at his best girl.

“WINN! FOCUS!” Alex barks.

“Okay, right, sorry! Ray, can you get the lead bag around the regular kryptonite at least?”

“I…don't think so. I can…barely…move. If I get any closer I'll....probably...pass out too.”

Mon-El, having just sped into his super suit, grabs the headset from Winn.

“Ray, it's Mon-El. Can you open a portal?”

There's no answer, but a moment later, a breach opens and Mon-El runs through it, directly to Kara's side. She's still breathing, thank Rao. He grabs the lead-lined bag.

Thankfully unaffected by either substance, he places the green rock in the bag, and stuffs the greyish Anti-K into the gold decanter, sealing the ancient lid as best he can.

Sickness-inducing rocks now rendered inert, he picks up his wife in his arms and speeds through the portal back to the DEO. A moment later, he comes back for Ray. The portal closes behind him.

No longer exposed to the kryptonites, Kara and Ray start to recover in the DEO med bay. Kara wakes after a few minutes, yellow sun lamps shining down on her, still in her party dress. Ray, deriving no particular benefit from the lamps, needs a little more time to get his strength back.

“What happened?” Kara asks groggily. “Did we get the Anti-K?”

“We did,” her sister answers. “But now we have a problem. We have to replace both rocks with dummy versions to make sure no one knows we were here. Ray, do you think you can breach back and set everything to rights in the vault?”

“Yeah, I think I can…” Ray tries to stand, and his legs fold under him like card table, leaving him in a pile in the floor. “Uh, actually, I think I need a few more minutes,” he concedes as Alex and Mon-El help him back onto the bed.

“Well, we don't have much time,” Winn and Eve come running into the room. “That Frist guy is on his way to the vault right now. I can see him on the security feed. We have maybe five or ten minutes.”

“Crap, what do we do?” Kara wonders as the fogginess in her brain slowly dissipates.

“I can go,” Mon-El offers. “Just open the portal back up and I'll be in and out.”

“You need to wear Ray's suit though. To re-arm the vault alarm,” Winn reminds him.

“How? I thought only he could use it.”

“Normally that's the case, but I added an access modification for you, just in case something like this happened,” Ray explains.

“You did? Wow, that’s…thanks, Ray…”

“Honey! You need to hurry! Go!” Kara yells in her husband's general direction.

Winn hands him the dummy rock they had ready to go for the Anti-K, plus one he just had 3D printed to replace the regular Kryptonite. The real Anti-K temporarily housed in an unused storeroom in the bowels of the DEO until they can figure out how to encase it better, Mon-El grabs the gold decanter as well and speeds into the suit as Ray gives him a very brief tutorial on its use.

The portal opens once again, and the Daxamite steps through, items in hand. He replaces the kryptonites, closes the case, and places the decanter back in its spot on a nearby shelf. Then her uses Ray's tech to deal with the vault lock and alarm, shrinking down so the motion sensors can't see him.

Just in the nick of time, too, as Kara buzzes in his ear “Baby! Smithers is at the door!”

“Who's Smithers?”

“Webster's head flunky.”

“Why do you guys keep calling him that? I thought his name was Frist!”

“For Rao’s sake, just hide!”

Hearing the hiss of the vault door opening, Mon-El quickly sneaks behind the decanter he just replaced. Somewhat in awe of his newfound perspective on the world, his tiny form peeks excitedly over the top of the thing, watching Frist saunter around the small room. He scans the shelves, pokes at the box that formerly held the now-pilfered rocks, but doesn't appear to find anything alarming.

“Everything looks to be in place here,” he says into his walkie-talkie. “Yes, I'm in the vault, dumbass. You heard Webster's order…no, I didn't think a couple of douchey millennials going AWOL from the party merited a trip down here, either, but he's the boss...Yeah, okay, keep looking, I'll be right up.”

Just as Frist is about to leave, his gaze lands on the decanter currently hiding one miniaturized Daxamite. Mon-El silently curses his bad luck and tries to blend in with the embossed image of people dancing on the side of the thing. Frist grabs the decanter, has a quick peek inside the jug as if expecting to find something, then gives a shrug and carefully places it back in its spot.

“Weird, could have sworn that thing was facing the other way…” he mutters as he turns away. Mon-El heaves a sigh of relief as he relaxes, no longer having to pose like a tiny drunken reveler depicted in gold.

When he's sure Frist is gone, he portals back to the med bay.

“Okay, the vault is taken care of, but we have one last thing we need to deal with. Looks like Webster noted your conspicuous absence from the party and everyone's on high alert looking for you. You gotta go back. Are you both up for it?”

“We're gonna have to be, I guess.” Kara drags herself up from the bed and helps Ray to his feet. “Okay, they know we're on the grounds somewhere, so, we'll just say we were looking at the gardens or something,” Ray shrugs.

“Okay, whatever, let's just go.”

“I'm going with you this time,” Mon-El adds. “In case something else happens.”

“Sure, fine, babe. Let's get the portal open.” At this, Mon-El shrinks down again and perches on his wife's shoulder.

“Hold on, I didn't pre-program this destination, I need to enter it in,” Ray says, typing on what appears to be a watch, but is actually the courier that's been assisting them in opening breaches all night.

“Well, hurry!” Kara rushes, verging on frantic.

“Okay, here we go.” The portal opens into a dark space and they rush through, only to find themselves not in a garden, but rather in some sort of small greenhouse.

“Whoops. I guess I must have flubbed the coordinates a little,” Ray apologizes.

Outside, they hear rustling. They've been spotted through the glass, apparently. They hear a gruff voice yell “Got 'em! They're over here!”

“Crap! Now what? We can't say we were looking at a garden,” Kara says.

“Well, there's always your earlier idea.”

“...Yeah, I think we're out of options.”

“Uh, that wasn't a serious suggestion…”

“Wait, what?” a small voice on Kara's shoulder pipes in. “Tell me you're not thinking what I think you're thinking...”

Ignoring him, as they hear footsteps approaching, Kara and Ray look at each other, brows furrowed.

“Okay, well, _this_ is happening,” Kara says resignedly as she wraps her arms around Ray and plants her lips on his. Ray's eyes widen before he slams them shut as the door swings open, his hands gripping the small of her back.

“ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?!” the tiny voice says. Luckily, it's not loud enough to be heard by the approaching security guards.

“Excuse me!” Frist says as he marches through the door, visibly irritated. “This area is off limits. I'm going to have to ask you to leave.” Kara and Ray pull away from each other, leaving Ray shellshocked, his mouth covered by smudges of her lipstick.

“Oh, gosh…we're sorry. Just can't wait for the honeymoon! Umm…we'll go.” Kara drags Ray behind her as they depart the greenhouse and are escorted off the premises.

Escaping at last into their DEO-sponsored limo, they sit in awkward silence for a moment.

“So that was…” Ray starts.

“Yeah…”

Another pause.

“Well, you're still a good kisser…” Ray jokes, hoping to lighten the mood. With a sudden whoosh, Mon-El expands back to regular size, pulling off the helmet and staring daggers at the two of them. But mostly at Kara.

“Umm, HELLO. Remember me? Your husband? STILL RIGHT HERE.”

Kara laughs profusely while Ray wears his patented wide-eyed deer-in-headlights face. Kara takes one look at him, doubles over with even more laughter, until her face is red and streaks of mascara drip from each eye as tears begin to escape.

After a moment, Mon-El can't help but join her. Ray finally succumbs too, and by the time the laugh-fest dies down everyone is just glad the evening is over, the mission was a success and everyone is safe.

“You know, that music…whoever…I mean, that guy who sort of manipulated all of us into finding our respective…destinies, or something?”

“Music Meister,” Kara and Mon-El respond in unison.

“Yeah…I'm still honestly a little confused about…all that. But I really do feel like everything worked out for the best.

“I think we agree,” Kara says, smiling lovingly at her mate.

“Though...next time you need help with a caper, how about you maybe call Barry instead?”

“Noted.” Mon-El says, putting up his armor-clad feet in the limo, one arm around Kara. “Say, it's still pretty early, kids are with your parents, and you're already in that fancy dress. How about I speed home, put on something nice, and take you out to dinner?”

Kara smiles and pulls her husband into a kiss.

“Aww, you know, you guys are...very...cute,” Ray says, uncomfortably trying to compensate for suddenly feeling like a third wheel. “So, um...can I have my suit back, please?”


End file.
